"Past visual experiences that stuck with Me":
Oh goodness this is tricky because I seem to harbor so many different ones. Places that seem to haunt my memory regularly? Well I think that the ones which left a vital impression are the ones that go deep into my early childhood. I remember the lake that I always went to. I remember seeing the rush of a fish gliding under the surface. I remember the heat from summer nights and that layer of sweat that always seemed to be caked to your skin. I remember the sound of the wind rushing through the woods, and the frogs singing in the tree tops. I can remember the cry of the wipper will bird in the distance. Those were happy times. Times when family got along. There was no dysfunction, all seemed cheerful and at ease. I remember the smell of burgers and hot dogs. We always walked down this road at night to get ice cream. I can remember always walking bare foot and getting my feet filthy in the dry earth. The drip of the ice cream down my chin. Gosh I had forgotten how much memory I had of the lake. There was this "beach" (that's what we always used to call a shore of the lake where we would settle and pic nic at) that I always loved. The sand on it was always white and there was this perfect nook where you could get just the right amount of shade. I used to catch these lizards that had this turqoise stripe on their backs, and pick rocks with my cousin. I remember swimming and skiing. I don't remember worrying at all when I was on that lake.
I have a hard time moving away from those memories. I don't seem to want to let go. I was so happy there.
Something else that happened to me recently was my trip to Washington DC. The group made a night hike to the lincoln memorial. I just vividly remember that walk up to good ole Abe. It was such an amazing moment. The air was quite chill, but there was such a sense of adventure. When we finally made it up the long pile of stairs this subtle yellow light hit Lincoln's face so perfectly. Revealing that wonderful little smirk.
A friend of mine understood how sensitive the mood was and immediately started spilling secrets. There was something in the air that night that just made you want to examine your life and find meaning. I am absolutely convinced that it had everything to do with the environment. It was as if Lincoln was speaking to our souls.
I believe in examining both the good and the bad. And there are definitely some environments which left a mark, or more like a scar to be exact. There was this house that my mother used to live in. It was not extravagant, in fact it was quite small but it just had some kind of feeling in it that I did not like. I am not sure that I could define it, nor that I would have any desire to. There was an old man that my mother use to watch over. He was not a friendly character and he always used to roam around the creek where I played. I remember his eyes were so black and unwelcoming. A suspicious snarl always apparent on his face.
I do have one memory that just now came back. It's not really bad nor good. Just one that has stuck with me. It is of a room in a house where my grandmother use to take care of an elderly lady named Nell. It was a library, very dusty. I just remember roaming around one day and picking up a book from one of the shelves. Once I opened it I remember seeing a flower (I think it was a carnation) underneath the cloud of dust that had been pressed. For some reason I remember a heaven like light cascading through the long window with its billowing curtains. The light hit the flower in the book perfectly. It's petals had aged wonderfully, some color still remained. I guess that would be more of a happier memory.
I've enjoyed this. It's nice to know how much of my past is still in tact within my visual memory.